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Venturing away from England during the football season leaves the traveller with a dilemna. You can either ignore it altogether, a bit of cold turkey style rehab, let it happen without getting involved; or you can spend too much time and money in keeping up to speed with everything.
Having opted for the former approach during my time away in Croatia (stunning place, great people, well worth a visit) the realisation struck me that my move to step away from the game had little if any effect whatsoever. If a tree falls in the woods but there is no-one there to hear it, of course it still makes a bloody sound. If I choose to ignore football for a week, it won't remain in limbo, waiting for me to come back so that I don't miss anything; far from it.
Take England for example.
I left the country feeling, like many, disillusioned and questioning my love for the England team. Over the years, what have they ever actually given me, why do I allow them to keep treating me this way? They don't deserve my support, I told myself. They have to earn the right to my support. They can't just knock me about for years then expect me to come back every time, battered and bruised but full of more desperate hope and misguided love.
When most couples are on a break (as me and England were) one will usually take the time to live it up, go round shagging and enjoying themselves; whilst the other wallows in self-pity and introspective grief. Turns out England are no different...when I finally decided to answer the phone, what's this?!
New kit?
New players?
A more fluid and flexible approach?
Vibrant, dynamic play?
Rooney actually running and doing something decent?
Wow, maybe they have changed. Was I wrong to shun them-what have I done...?!
Don't be fooled readers, I have not jumped lovingly back into their arms just yet. Saddam Hussein said he would change to become a better partner for Satan, but deep down it was obvious that he was still the same abusive, cocky, nasty bugger with an overblown opinion of his own importance.
England, I am willing to give it another go, but don't think I'm not on to you.
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As for my other footballing love - the one that has an even more shameful record for letting me down, hurting me and treating me like dirt (but the good times are sooo good) - well they really went nuts in my absence.
Southampton were everyones favourites to storm League One with ease. Everyone that is except Saints fans. We knew things would not be that easy, we knew teams would see us as the scalp, we knew it was not the Saints way to be favourites. But Christ, we didn't know it could go this wrong.
Without a chairman, without a manager, eliminated from two competitions already (including one that we were defending) and with a woeful start to the League campaign, the Saints are already playing catch up and cannot afford for this slump to continue much longer before things start to turn very nasty.
I'm serious, I will straight up walk out of here and there is nothing you can do to stop me.
"To the left, to the left, putting all my Saints stuff in a box to the left - don't you ever for a second get to thinking you're irreplaceable."
Melbourne Heart won their first game the other day, and Croatia won as well. I'm just saying, there's always plenty more fish in the sea...
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