Where it all began

As September ends it has dawned on me that I've been writing this blog now for almost 5 months (I know, right?) and whilst the mega-fame and 5-book deal is yet to materialise, I have been enjoying it and thanks to you lovely people have received some decent feedback.

You might be thinking that this is the first time I have ever tried anything like this. Well friends, think again. My first foray into writing about football came over 12 years ago (only 2 days out from the date I started this blog, coincidentally) and rather than tell you all about it, I thought the best thing would be simply to show you.

Reading the letter it seems clear that this has always been my destined path, mainly because I'm happy to spend far too long in my spare time (of which I now have a lot, any employers in Sydney, gissajob) writing about football.

So below, in all it's glory, is my strongly worded letter to Glenn Hoddle, England Manager.

For the Love of the Game...?

Last night BBC1's regular sports magazine show 'Inside Sport' was handed over to former England Cricketer Ed Smith.

Smith, who is now a successful journalist with The Times, had put together an interesting and engaging documentary examining the question: 'Is Professionalism Killing Sport'.

The program focussed on a number of sports, drawing from interviews with psychologists, coaches and high profile stars such as Ryan Giggs, jockey A P McCoy and Usain Bolt; as well as Smith's own personal experience. Smith confessed that his childhood love of cricket became further from the truth and harder to recapture with the increasing success of his career. The higher his status and stock rose, naturally so rose the stress and pressure to perform.

Numerous people on the show concurred with the opinion that as the stakes and the pressure rise, things become impossible to enjoy. The meticulous preparation exemplified by Clive Woodward's reign in charge of the England rugby team - whilst it led to unparalleled success - also created an environment of analysis, statistical insight and repetition. In such a cold clinical system, where is the room for messing about, laughing, having fun?

Interestingly, Ryan Giggs was not so supportive of this view. He argued that football thrives on the instinctive, the maverick and the extraordinary - stating (perhaps modestly) that he was never thinking when he produced his best moments on the football pitch. He spoke in glowing terms about the maestro Eric Cantona, and the fact that he produced such incredible genius time and again, but always in such a natural and instinctive manner.

I was so pleased to hear this from Giggs and rejoiced in the fact that the documentary put forward conflicting viewpoints.

Growing up, my hero was Matthew Le Tissier. Even trying to remove the obvious bias, I find it hard to concede that there was a more gifted, natural and instinctive player in the world at the time that Le Tissier was at his best (1993-95) but one thing that is completely unarguable is the stamp that he left on my young footballing psyche.

Le Tiss always produced some incredible stuff on the pitch. Flicks, touches, vision, and a showreel of goals that is just ridiculous; YouTube it, you won't regret it. It seemed impossible to think that he ever felt that the professional status had altered or lessened the way he played the game and the enjoyment that he derived from it.

Because of this, I have always tried things on a pitch that with my limited ability I probably shouldn't. Football is a game after all, it should be played for fun and why not try and be expressive when playing it. Lionel Messi is the best player in the world, he has won the European Cup twice, the FIFA World Player of the Year and is only 23 - and he never looks like the weight of professionalism is weighing him down.

Granted, picking Cantona, Giggs, Le Tissier and Messi as your proof that football is a different kettle of fish might be a slightly unfair subject group - but I am going to do it anyway. I think the reason these players are able to play in such a manner even with the weight of the world on them is due to the inherent nature of the game. With rugby, horse racing, athletics, cycling and in particular cricket, there is an intense amount of concentration and discipline required due to the nature of the sport. Football is a more fast-paced, fluid and ultimately chaotic sport than any of these others and no matter how much preparation goes into anything, it can all be undone instantly with a moment of unstoppable genius.

Jose Mourinho has built a career of success purely on the strategy of ignoring everything I have just said, and clearly footballers do need to concentrate intensely and are under extreme pressure - think how many tight games are settled on one mistake - but I still believe there is so much room for expression in the beautiful game that it should never, at any level, be a completely robotic and functional exercise in concentration and stress.

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You may be feeling like you have just lost 3 minutes of your life to an argument that never really reached a proper conclusion. Well friend, you are probably right. So why not comment and give me your stance on whether footballers should stop enjoying it and play like disciplined Jose-bots; or allow the natural flair and expression to come out and give us the moments that last forever...

And here is a video to reward your patience and continued support

Wide Open

This week's Carling Cup action - at the stage where Premiership teams traditionally field weakened sides knowing their inferior opponents will not present an obstacle - threw up all manner of surprises.

Chelsea

Liverpool

Tottenham

Everton

Man City

2 days ago, all of those teams would have fancied their chances of winning this competition, and now have to write it off as a Mickey Mouse trophy that they don't care about. In the style of the jilted teenager, they were going to dump her anyway, stupid cow, and they're better off without her. Plus she's ugly and they'd rather pull her mates much more anyway.

Throw in the fact that Bolton, Blackburn, Sunderland and Fulham are also eliminated, and it really is anyone's to win. It is likely to boil down to Arsenal or Man United, but it will be intriguing to watch some of the Premier League and Football League's lesser lights give it their best shot.

For what it's worth (which is nothing), I'd like Arsenal to win to remove some of the '5 years without a trophy' pressure on Arsene Wenger, but if I was a betting man I'd be looking towards Old Trafford.

Alex Ferguson's men have the chance to be only the second team to win the League Cup three years in a row. The first to do it? Liverpool. Not like there's any rivalry or motivation there then...

The Grumpus

2 years ago, almost to the day, Dimitar Berbatov made his Manchester United debut against Liverpool. Yesterday, against the same opposition with which he began his United career, he enjoyed the high point of his time so far.

A hat-trick is always going to ensure that you take the plaudits - but scoring all 3 goals in a 3-2 win, culminating with the winner with less than ten minutes to go, pretty much guarantees hero status. Factor in that it was against bitter rivals (make no mistake, this is the biggest fixture in English football) and also included a spectacular overhead kick, and things could not have gone much better for the Bulgarian striker.

Throughout his time at United he has received a great deal of criticism, but one thing that can never be questioned is his ability. A first touch that fellow professionals at the elite end of the game cannot dream to match; skill and technique to burn, and a general approach that just makes the whole thing look so easy...Berbatov is blessed with all of these attributes, but there is one key deficit:

Dimitar Berbatov is a moody bugger.

To his defence, he is smart enough to know that there is no need or advantage in him sprinting around, chasing lost causes and generally wasting energy. He operates like a predator - deadly and lethal when he can sense the kill; languid and reserved at all other times. This is one thing that will always rankle with many football fans - consider the hero status with which Carlos Tevez was regarded by the very same Old Trafford patrons, largely on the basis that he ran around like a lunatic - they will regard Berbatov's approach as anything from lazy to downright disrespectful. An easy way to win the fans over is to at least show you 'care' and get yourself stuck in.

Berbatov has refused to take this approach thus far, and is now seemingly revelling in the role of key man. He knows that his abilities are sufficient to win the fans over - and they certainly seemed convinced yesterday. Alex Ferguson will be greatly troubled by Wayne Rooney's ongoing malaise - but the fact that it has enabled Berbatov to step up and run the show has been one obvious benefit to the whole mess.

Whilst I agree with his refusal to adapt his game to a less cerebral and more 'passionate' headless chicken style approach, I do think he could make the odd concession to win the fans over and become even more of a hero to them.

He was substituted late on yesterday, in what was clearly a decision based on first of all the sensible move to withdraw a striker for an extra defensive minded player; but secondly the chance to give the Number 9 the ovation his performance deserved. Old Trafford rose to acclaim the man of the match, and he trudged off looking like Rio Ferdinand had just merked his Mum.

Dimitar, if you're reading this (as is highly probable), all you need to do mate is be a bit more bloody friendly!! A wave and clap to every corner of the ground, a few high fives to the fans who were leaning over to congratulate you - it's really not much to ask is it? If he can add that to his persona and continue this level of form all season, a place in the pantheon of United legends is well within his grasp.

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As a final word, one thing that was noted after Berbatov's impressive second goal was the impact that the crossbar can have on a goal. Had his overhead kick floated into the net a few feet below the bar, people might have examined Reina's involvement and suggested that there was not a huge amount of power on the shot. As it was, clipping the bar and then firing up into the roof of the net, it just looks so freakin cool. Don't believe me? Ask Tony Yeboah.

Mixed Emotions

The Champions League returned this week and once again the English Premier League sent a full contingent of 4 teams into the group stage to compete against the continent's finest clubs. And MSK Zilina.

But how did they do? Well, you impatient swine, if you just keep reading you will find out. Jeez.

Arsenal (6-0 win over SC Braga of Portugal)

This result could easily be shrugged off with a few pertinent facts. This was Braga's first ever Champions League 'proper' fixture; they offered little to no resistance once Arsenal found the early break-through; and they made the fatal error of allowing the Gunners space to express themselves. But express themselves they did.

This was at times a sensational display of football by Wenger's men. There is no need to read into what it might mean for their season - much sterner tests will follow and it is on these that this side will be ultimately judged - but there is every reason to heap praise on the brand of football demonstrated to such devastating effect at the Emirates last night.

It is when you watch Arsenal (and, of course, their older, stronger, smarter and better-looking brother Barcelona) that you remember why football is known as the Beautiful Game. Anyone who strolled past my living room last night may have had serious concerns about what was going on in there due to the sounds emanating - but their passing, touch and movement is pretty much Football Porn.

As mentioned, the real test for this team will come later in the season when they will need to avoid their increasingly commonplace Springtime capitulation, but for the time being it is just great to watch a team capable of such glorious football.

The final word has to go to Cesc Fabregas. at the peak of his game for so long, it is ridiculous to realise that he is only 23. Arguably the best player in England, if he was English he would have been knighted about 4 years ago and would now run a coalition government with D-Beck. Phenomenal player and surely the heir to the maestro Xavi Hernandez.

Chelsea (1-4 win over MSK Zilina of Slovakia)

Did you ever have that feeling as a kid when you start running down a hill, and then you hit the point where actually you are in no control of your legs and you are reaching speeds that you never knew existed? That unstoppable and destructive momentum is Chelsea right now, with one key difference.

The kid is about to go arse over elbow and part ways with a significant percentage of his skin. Chelsea meanwhile show no signs of stopping their relentless path of destruction; like the Juggernaut in Duel, they just keep going and going and going.

This game was done and dusted inside 30 minutes as Ancelotti's men cruised into a 3-0 lead. ITV's pundits tried to highlight problems and focussed on Petr Cech, but given that they have conceded only twice all season, this is arguably somewhat harsh.

It is difficult to look past Chelsea to be serious contenders for every competition they enter this year. The addition of Benayoun looks in these early stages to be a success - his vision to set up Sturridge was exceptional - and the fact that Ancelotti is increasingly placing faith in young players suggests a healthy balance at the club.

Zilina did not disgrace themselves and will provide competition for their remaining Group F rivals, but Chelsea should be expected to cruise through the group stage and will have serious designs on reaching Wembley many times in 2011.

Man United (0-0 draw at home to Rangers)

The very essence of a gamble is that there is an inherent risk involved. The bigger the gamble, the less likely it is to come off - but the greater the rewards if it does.

Alex Ferguson put faith in what was almost a second string team - albeit one littered with talent throughout - in a decision that he will not have seen as a massive gamble. He would have expected these players to find a way through the Rangers defence, and the pay-off is keeping some key players fresh ahead of Sunday's clash with Liverpool.

A 0-0 draw suggests the gamble did not pay off. Combine into the mix the fact that Luis Valencia suffered an ankle injury that has ruled him out for most of the season, and this goes down as a very bad night for Fergie et al.

Bottom line however is that United will qualify from this group, most likely as winners unless Valencia continue their impressive start. They did not lose this match, and Rangers adopted such uber-defensive tactics that a failure to break through is understandable if not ideal. If United go on to beat Liverpool and then top Group C, this result will not be seen in the apocalyptic light that the tabloids have chosen to paint it in...but Valencia may well disagree with me.

Tottenham Hotspur (2-2 away at Werder Bremen)

A paradox in football is that one single result can be interpreted and viewed in many different ways. (Wait, is that a paradox? Maybe. Anyway, moving on...)

Tottenham have come away from a tricky tie in their first ever Champions League group match with a point, and have played well to earn that point, and had chances to claim all three. And yet they are disappointed.

Had Spurs found themselves rocked by 2 early Bremen goals, with the young Polish left winger tearing them to shreds every time he got the ball and the awkward lanky German forward causing all manner of problems, they would be utterly delighted to have clawed their way back into the game and ultimately salvaged a point.

The fact that it happened in reverse and Twitchy McArse's men threw away a 2 goal lead has left them feeling despondent about what could have been. They should refelct on this as a promising debut and a platform on which to build. Inter will be a different kettle of fish, but at least they are on level pegging and have every right to be optimistic.

And there, ladies and gentlemen, is the paradox. Same result, a 2-2 draw, yet resultant in different emotions.

(Hmm. Still not sure if that counts? Let me know!!)

Mr Sitter

It often seems to be the way over a footballing weekend that one particular feature of the game rises to prominence. A spate of own goals, a particular type of bad challenge or a cluster of great strikes; whatever it is they often seem to occur in unison.

This weekend the fashion was for seemingly impossible misses. The Wigan striker Mauro Boselli was perhaps the Premier League's main cuplrit, failing to even hit the target with a headed chance that looked much easier to score.

Miss of the weekend and possibly of all time however came in the friendly between AFC Hamsey and Tudor Athletic of the Redhill & District League. A player who mercifully will remain nameless was presented the ball at a distance of less than 1 yard in front of a completely open net. Just give it a little tap. Tap, tap, taperoo.

Instead, the poor midfielder managed to fall over his own feet, and actually divert the ball away from goal in a manner that would have baffled scientists and been declared physically impossible by most. Incredible, incredible miss and it resulted in immediate laughter and derision from every single person who witnessed it. Shocking. I promise you, you have never seen anything like it.

It is very easy to tear someone apart when they are guilty of such a crime against football and humanity in general. It seems inexplicable, and depending on the circumstances, unforgiveable, but is this really the right way to deal with the no-doubt traumatised and humiliated poor losers? Now, having been there myself, most notably when playing for my Hall at Uni and missing a tap-in to seal a hat-trick, I am going to defend the Missers.

Often it can be down to a horrible bounce from a rubbish pitch. Maybe the pace on the ball is not right, and if it is even a few inches away from where it needs to be, it can be impossible to convert. Perhaps a crucial deflection from the goalkeeper or defender deviates the path of the ball enough to cruelly deny the would-be scorer. What about the wind, that might play an invisible yet crucial part? Many times it is clear that the player has assumed the goal is a certainty, and so has not applied the necessary concentration and focus to do what is required.

Or maybe we're all just crap.

Love Blog

After a break from writing to concentrate on the job of getting married, I'm pleased to announce that Sub Please is back in action, and has risen swiftly again to the top of my priority list, despite a brief usurping. Thanks for sticking with it, I promise to never leave you like that again...

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Venturing away from England during the football season leaves the traveller with a dilemna. You can either ignore it altogether, a bit of cold turkey style rehab, let it happen without getting involved; or you can spend too much time and money in keeping up to speed with everything.

Having opted for the former approach during my time away in Croatia (stunning place, great people, well worth a visit) the realisation struck me that my move to step away from the game had little if any effect whatsoever. If a tree falls in the woods but there is no-one there to hear it, of course it still makes a bloody sound. If I choose to ignore football for a week, it won't remain in limbo, waiting for me to come back so that I don't miss anything; far from it.

Take England for example.

I left the country feeling, like many, disillusioned and questioning my love for the England team. Over the years, what have they ever actually given me, why do I allow them to keep treating me this way? They don't deserve my support, I told myself. They have to earn the right to my support. They can't just knock me about for years then expect me to come back every time, battered and bruised but full of more desperate hope and misguided love.

When most couples are on a break (as me and England were) one will usually take the time to live it up, go round shagging and enjoying themselves; whilst the other wallows in self-pity and introspective grief. Turns out England are no different...when I finally decided to answer the phone, what's this?!

New kit?

New players?

A more fluid and flexible approach?

Vibrant, dynamic play?

Rooney actually running and doing something decent?

Wow, maybe they have changed. Was I wrong to shun them-what have I done...?!

Don't be fooled readers, I have not jumped lovingly back into their arms just yet. Saddam Hussein said he would change to become a better partner for Satan, but deep down it was obvious that he was still the same abusive, cocky, nasty bugger with an overblown opinion of his own importance.

England, I am willing to give it another go, but don't think I'm not on to you.

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As for my other footballing love - the one that has an even more shameful record for letting me down, hurting me and treating me like dirt (but the good times are sooo good) - well they really went nuts in my absence.

Southampton were everyones favourites to storm League One with ease. Everyone that is except Saints fans. We knew things would not be that easy, we knew teams would see us as the scalp, we knew it was not the Saints way to be favourites. But Christ, we didn't know it could go this wrong.

Without a chairman, without a manager, eliminated from two competitions already (including one that we were defending) and with a woeful start to the League campaign, the Saints are already playing catch up and cannot afford for this slump to continue much longer before things start to turn very nasty.

I'm serious, I will straight up walk out of here and there is nothing you can do to stop me.

"To the left, to the left, putting all my Saints stuff in a box to the left - don't you ever for a second get to thinking you're irreplaceable."

Melbourne Heart won their first game the other day, and Croatia won as well. I'm just saying, there's always plenty more fish in the sea...