The Fab 30...?

So, the 30 preliminary names for Fabio’s squad have been announced, and I can’t say this looks like a team that will win the World Cup to me.

Goalkeepers: Joe Hart, David James, Robert Green.

Defenders: Leighton Baines, Jamie Carragher, Ashley Cole, Michael Dawson, Rio Ferdinand, Glen Johnson, Ledley King, John Terry, Matthew Upson, Stephen Warnock.

Midfielders: Gareth Barry, Michael Carrick, Joe Cole, Steven Gerrard, Tom Huddlestone, Adam Johnson, Frank Lampard, Aaron Lennon, James Milner, Scott Parker, Theo Walcott, Shaun Wright-Phillips.

Forwards: Darren Bent, Peter Crouch, Jermain Defoe, Emile Heskey, Wayne Rooney.

As far as keepers go, I expect David James will start the opening game, and as much as he is a likeable, intelligent bloke (he writes for The Guardian don't you know) with excellent shot stopping abilities and years of experience…you just know he is capable of having one of those headf**k brain aneurisms that will cost us dearly. Spain can pick from Reina, Casillas, Valdes…any one of those three would vastly improve our last line of defence.

Jamie Carragher…no. Sorry, just no. It’s not 2005. He is rightly a hero to Liverpool fans but surely even they will admit this has not been his best season, and I don’t think he should have been brought back into the fold. Why is it that in this country we have to value throwing your body on the line as the ultimate sign of a good defender. Pique’s goal for Barca against Inter could only be scored by Rio in our defensive squad, I can’t think of any other English centre half in my lifetime with that technique; as we only value people who get rid. ‘Ave it.

I think at least once this Summer we will concede a goal of such timeless and epic farce that it will be played for years to come with a Benny Hill soundtrack and cartoon sound effects. Terry, turning and grappling, hands out like a starfish…gets done for pace but what’s this, James has raced 35 yards out of goal to cover…he slips, takes out Deadly Ledley (tournament over), leaving the Slovenian striker to roll into an empty net on account of Ashley’s pre-occupation with the fit girl in Row B. (Slovenians will probably have some fit fans).

I’m glad to see Joe Cole in the midfield – game time or not, he is capable of a bit of class and something different that it sorely lacking in too many of the others. I still firmly believe that Walcott will have his moment and will be a hero in at least one game for England, if he can get a bit of confidence in an early group game this could be his tournament. If he asks Lionel nicely, that is.

Goals…The goal threat in this team starts with an R and looks like a wet potato that rolled across a barber shop floor. Everything that we do should revolve around getting the ball to Rooney in front of goal. If that means putting Heskey in the starting line-up then I say go with it, OK he doesn’t score - but when he plays, Rooney scores. I would love for Peter Crouch to start but in international football I find he gets called up for too many fouls that are purely the result of his physique. I hear (via today’s Metro) he is working on something special for his goal celebration though.

My prediction for the unlucky 7 to drop out:

Warnock, Dawson, Barry, Parker, SWP, Huddlestone, Bent

Let me know what you think...